WTF Wednesday: Whacked-Out Searches

So it's "Wordless Wednesday" around the blogosphere, but y'all know me - "wordless" isn't exactly my forte. Still, I'm going to have a little help from someone else's words: namely, the ones people type into their search engines, whereby they end up here at my blog. And since they're mostly weird, I'm entitling today WTF Wednesday. Because OMG, I love me some Internet acronyms! LOL

... Ahem.

Now, without further ado, I would like to present to you some actual search terms people have used to reach my blog. Sometimes creepy, but always hilarious.

#1: Zombie Motivational Sippie Cup. Because nothing motivates a small child to break free from the bottle than the prospect of staring at something scary while they sip their juice.

#2: Lick my heels. Seriously? If someone licked my heels right now, they'd feel like they had run their tongue over a cheese grater. I mean ... it's winter.

#3: Sometimes I like to lay on the floor and pretend I'm a carrot. Well duh. Don't we all?

#4: Thus, the solution practically in our hands. It's so obvious why this search term ended up right here at the Frump: I have all the answers. Just ask me.

#5: Frickin' tulips. I know. Flowers are sooooo annoying.

#6: Priceless turd. I don't know why somebody would Google this, but I sincerely hope they found what they were looking for.

#7: Knock knock jokes about volcanoes. ... I'm pretty sure that was Colin.

#8: My wife keeps farting. News flash ... it's because she's your wife now and not the girlfriend who was trying to impress you. You put the ring on it, and now she's all, "Ahhh, I can let my guard down. *fart*"

#9: The most amazing inspirational picture ever. You know, I always try to put a picture with each post. And I'd like to think that whoever came across my blog with this search term found exactly the picture they were looking for. I mean, I have a whole array of them - perhaps this little number?

This inspires me, all right. ... To brush my teeth.

And finally,

#10: Nosepicking funny boy. Well, there's no better place to go for that than here, is there?


  1. #8 is my favorite. Hands down.

  2. Bwhahahahaha. I would love to know what people are searching for on my blog. I just need to figure out how to do that.

  3. Love ALL of these! Holy crap, ha.

    "Wife keeps farting." Hmm, was that MY husband??

  4. I have had some people find me in weird ways too, I have to find out by the way you have too, that should be interesting.

  5. The internet is a strange place, isn't it? Someone came to my blog googling "skinny girl on all fours". First, I was flattered about the skinny part. 2nd, they found a picture of me trying to exercise with my dog licking my face. I hope that's what they wanted.


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