Babies + Facebook = Asshole

I have a love/hate relationship with my phone. If I don't have it with me, I miss important stuff. If I do have it on me, I'm always struggling not to drop it into the toilet, or the flour canister, or the dog poop, or the laundry, or whatever I happen to be contending with. It's probably kind of a miracle that I even still have a phone.

Like pretty much anyone with a smartphone, I use the Facebook app (wherein you can "Like" Fighting off Frumpy. You know, if you're awesome). The other night I posted a photo of the boys. A bad one, as you can see below, with a caption about how hard it is to get a decent picture of them. Then I went on about my usual bidness, but I kept my phone on me to check all the delicious notifications as people "Liked" and commented on my post.* 

*Don't lie. You know you do it too.

Anyway, one of the comments was from my mother-in-law's cousin. She's so sweet, and we were just at her house a couple of weeks ago for a family reunion. On the photo, she commented, "Oh ........ love these boys so much! Sure wish we lived closer!"

As I read this comment, I was in the process of carrying Corbin to the bathtub. He was on my right hip, and I had my phone in my right hand - Facebook app open. My left hand was carrying soap and a towel, so I could hardly stop Corbin when his chubby little fingers started gliding around the phone's screen. It was only after I got him into the tub that I checked my phone again, and was horrified to note that he had not only managed to post a response, but a completely terrible one at that. See for yourselves:

Y'all? I almost died. I mean ... it would have been understandable if he'd posted something baby-esque, like FJKDLFDSJRI or whatever. You know, something that looked random. But WHAT are the ODDS of him posting "No" - capitalized, even - and making me look like a total rude-ass?

Apparently pretty good. I only wish I were that lucky when I play the lottery.

Of course, then I had a dilemma. I could have deleted the comment and hoped she hadn't seen it - but if she had, and I deleted it without explanation, it would have looked fishy. So I left it on there, then added a lame comment about how Corbin had done it. She didn't answer. She probably didn't believe me and will hate me for the rest of my life. I wouldn't blame her. It sounds like such a lame excuse. It's the "my dog ate my homework" of the Facebook world.

Babies. They're so tech-savvy these days.

... Unfortunately.


  1. I really enjoy your blog full of so many good laughs ans good info more importantly, my son changed the language of my phone to something totally weird and unreadable. I could not figure out how he did it!! Lol soon our kids will have to help us navigate thru our computers and phones


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