Don't worry, my pretties, you're safe ... it's the chocolate I'm after.
Sometime last week, my husband came home with a bag of Easter candy. "This isn't everything I want to get for the Easter baskets," he said, "but at least we've got a head start." And he put it in the closet, hidden from the boys.
But y'all? When there's a bag of Easter candy in my closet, I totally have to see what's in there.
And oh my word. He got chocolate.
If it had been anything else, I could have stayed out of it. In fact, the marshmallow Peeps are still in there, unopened. So are the fruity little suckers, and a couple of other unappetizing things. But ... there were caramel-filled Cadbury eggs! And mini Cadbury eggs! And Reese's peanut butter eggs! You know how I get when faced with peanut butter and chocolate. And I'm pregnant. With cravings.
You see where this is going, right?
Yesterday when we were doing some grocery shopping, I casually mentioned that we needed to finish the Easter baskets. And Curtis was all, "At least we already have the candy." And I was all, "............"
He swiveled around to face me. "We do have the candy ... right?"
"We have Peeps," I said. "And suckers. And those, like, cheap waxy chocolate coins."
"... But the caramel Cadbury eggs? The mini Cadbury eggs? The Reese's eggs?"
"You didn't," Curtis said.
".... I did," I replied sheepishly. "I mean, it took a few days ..."
He sighed. Probably thinking about what a fat gluttonous cow his wife has become, what with eating all the Easter candy meant for the children and such.
When we got to the checkout counter, someone had left a six-pack of Reese's eggs randomly laying there. So I said, "Maybe we should get these, you know, to replace the ones that are ... um ... missing?"
Curtis snatched them out of my hands. "Are you kidding?" he asked. "There's still a week until Easter. We'd have to buy two more packs to replace this one by the time it actually rolls around." And then, mumbling to himself: "I need to hide the candy better next time."
He's right. It would take a