Reading is FunDUHmental

I'm glad I already know English, and how to read. I'm glad I learned it when I still had a super-absorbent-spongelike-little-kid-brain as opposed to the porous-yet-non-absorbent-scattered-Mommy-brain I possess today. (Case in point: I totally just had to Google how to spell "possess" because it looked weird.)

Colin is learning to read and write, and until I had to help him, I had no idea how confusing the English language must be. Yesterday he was making me a word search on a piece of paper, and I came across the same mysterious word he put on a grocery list not too long ago: TIT. It led into a rather frustrating exchange.

"Colin, what's this T-I-T say?"

"It says 'tight,' Mommy."

"Oh, okay. You know, 'tight' is spelled in a very funny way: it has a G-H in the middle. T-I-G-H-T."

He screwed up his face to contemplate it, so I further clarified: "Any time you see an I-G-H-T, it makes the 'ite' sound."

He brightened. "So kite has an I-G-H-T?"

Um.

"Well, no, son ... kite is actually spelled K-I-T-E. But lots of other words -"

"Write?"

"No, write has an I-T-E like kite, not an I-G-H-T."

"White?"

Uhhh ... hmmm. Don't even get me started on what happened when we came across the word "eight."

This isn't the first time I've attempted (poorly) to explain something stupid and confusing about the way our words work. Like why we don't pronounce the k in "know" or "knee" or the b in "lamb" or "comb." Or why in most words, an S-H makes the "sh" sound ... but in words like "vacation" or "action," it's the T-I that sounds like "sh." Or why we say "phone," but not "phork" or "pheelings."

Seriously, what?

If I didn't already know English, I'd be like, "Screw this. I'm speaking Portugese from now on."

It's a good thing he's a smart little dude. It's not like I'm helping him out much.


Comments

  1. We've had many of the same troubles. We've divided them in to "sound out words" (or words that make sense) and "sight words" (words that make no sense at all, but that's just the way it is). Who made all these rules?

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  2. Seriously, that is why no one can speak correctly. English is just too confusing.

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  3. English is a funny but awesome language.

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  4. Yea if English had to be my second language I run for the border. Oh, that makes me want Taco Bell all of a sudden.

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  5. English would be sooo hard to learn as an adult!

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  6. English is an extremely hard language to learn. If you look at a lot of the other languages you'll see that they are similar, but English is different from the rest.

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  7. I think you are right, I don't even want to think about all the mistakes I do, and I'm not aware of.

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  8. Hi,

    I've been following your blog for a while but this one made me chuckle with sympathy and I have to tell you about this - I picked my friend's six year old up from school and along the walk home she said "shooted" and I corrected her to say shot...I then went on to attempt to explain past and present tense to her... a six year old. Numbnut springs to mind.

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  9. oh my god!!! this must all be MIND BLOWING to learn!!! ay yi yi. this damn language. i swear, sometimes i wish i knew another one, as i am constantly farking up this one!

    p.s. that is so crazy that you remembered the photo i posted today! NUTS!!!

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  10. The English language makes NO SENSE! I keep bumping into this problem as my daughter is learning her letters. How do you explain to a toddler that some letters make 2 totally different sounds? You don't. . . the good news is that Colin DOES have a "super-absorbent-spongelike-little-kid-brain," and so he will somehow figure it all out - as did we all!

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  11. I'm so not looking forward to the whole teaching the kid how to read phase, 'cause yeah, English is HARD!

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  12. That is why I never want to teach elementary school English, I have enough trouble with my college age students.

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  13. Yes, as I've been teaching my daughter to read the last 2 years I realize that English SUCKS! Love your post!

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  14. ugh.
    I know what you mean. Having the same trouble here.

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  15. You know, it's instances such as this that I always think to myself, "How the heck did I ever learn to speak and write English, anyway?" Soooo complicated, isn't it?

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  16. English is confusing! Thank goodness for teachers.

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  17. Yep, as a teacher? I get these all the time. I have a few standard answers. like, "Well, that's life" and "if we understood everything, what fun would that be" or I blame it on Latin root words.

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  18. English has more "exceptions" to the rules than it has rules. I so admire the Thai portion of our family, who had to learn it after they got here. It's frustrating enough when we've grown up with it!

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  19. Oh great, thanks for reminding me about stuff like this. lol As if it weren't hard enough for me to say the letter "N" nnnnnnnnnn like NO and NEAT and NEVER and my 3 year old says "And KNEE?" umm yeah not so much son....but okay we'll go ahead and say it starts with an "N" okay! I SUCK at teaching, maybe that homeschooling isn't such a good idea!

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  20. They say that the English language is the hardest in the world to learn. I definitely believe it.

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  21. I remember having a small issue in english classes growing up...but then I started competing in speech contests and everything came clear! It worked wonders!

    WM

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  22. I am so in the thick of this problem right now. Jonah is an excellent reader (not to brag or anything, but the *best* reader in his kindy class =P). He has the ability to see words and use a combination of context and phonics to make an educated guess at what the word is if he doesn't know it. From there, once he gets it right, it just sort of sticks in his memory.

    But now we've entered the dreaded realm of the spelling test. I foolishly thought that this would be easy since Jonah KNOWS these words. Um, no. Reading words and spelling words are two significantly different skills. We do a lot of sounding out which Jonah is great at (and I have become a pro at saying words very, very slowly and deliberately... lol). But some of these words? Jesus. Besides asking the kid to simply memorize them without any rhyme or reason as to why they are spelled the way they are, I am at a loss as to how to do this. Silent letters, letters that make bizarro sounds alone or when combined, letters that sound like other letters.. ugh. It's a nightmare. He's too young to understand or accept the inconsistency of the "rules" of English and it's frustrating for both of us when I try and explain them.

    AND on top of spelling tests (which are bad enough), he also has to write dictated sentences, spelling every word. He actually had to write a report on lions recently (seriously, a REPORT.... in KINDERGARTEN!). It was so difficult for him that when asked about the experience, he will furrow his little brow and tell you "Well, I cried 'til the snot came, but I finished."

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  23. This is why English is one of the hardest languages to learn. I got frustrated with it just reading your blog. Whew!

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