I Have a Small Deck

I'm going to pretend like we're not expecting snow flurries today, and talk about something that excites me. Warm weather is coming (those of you who are already sporting shorts and flip flops can bite me. And I mean that in the nicest way possible).

But the one drawback to the warm weather is that it serves to highlight the inadequacy of one certain thing.

That's right folks. I'm admitting it to the world: I have a small deck. And during a season when everyone's flaunting their nice, sizeable decks ... it's hard for me, because my tiny little deck isn't impressing anybody.

Yeah, I know. It's not the size of your deck that counts - it's what you do with it. Right?

I can't help but feel, though, that my small and unremarkable deck has left more than one person feeling ... well, rather unsatisfied.

I've thought about enhancing it. I've even thought about taking more drastic measures and enlarging it. Lord knows I could take advantage of all the spam emails I get about making it bigger and stronger (at least I think they said "deck"). But all that is, you know, expensive. And potentially risky.

I mean, you don't want just anyone touching your deck.

To make matters worse, not only is my deck small, it's - (whisper) kinda discolored. And sort of ... dirty looking. And I KNOW nobody enjoys a dirty deck. I mean ... ugh. It's probably due to the fact that it just hangs out, all exposed and unprotected.

Yeah, I know. I don't need a lecture.

Anyway, this season I need to step it up. Do something about my dirty little deck. I may not be able to make it bigger right at this moment, but I've got to make the most of what I'm working with. Because y'all? I want my deck to make people gasp with delight.

So right now, I'm going to show you a picture. Prepare yourself.

You can gossip about it with your friends later, but don't laugh at its pitiful inadequacy in front of me.

I couldn't get it all to fit in the picture, but don't let that fool you. You can still tell it's small. And grungy.

So do I have any readers that have a genius touch when it comes to handling decks? Can I get some advice about turning mine into a deck that will be pleasurable for anyone who sits on it? Or maybe there's someone else who's ashamed of the size of their deck and can commiserate.

Either way, by the middle of this summer? I'll be showing you my deck again.

And next time you'll like it. I promise.


 



13 comments:

  1. OMG, too funny! Be grateful that you have a deck though. I don't even have one though I desperately want one. Just one big enough to sit on and watch the stars at night.

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  2. We don't have a deck...we have a half-assed patio where the roof partially covers it.

    It's the stupist design...EVER. There's not enough shade if the sun is out and if it's raining only half of it is covered.

    It's completely useless.

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  3. Paint that little sucker! How high off the ground is it? If no more than 4ft you could always take out the rail that runs parallel with the house and cascade some stairs down to open it up to the yard...
    Good luck and have fun!

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  4. We are going to have to do an entire deck makeover. Believe me, just because a deck is big (ours is HUGE) doesn't make it nice.

    AND we got our "come-uppances" this week, we were in flip flops all last week, this week we have been in the low 30s and just 50 mile away they got snow, so we need to just keep our mouths shut!

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  5. Hahahahaha! Loved this post, honestly one of my favourites.

    We don't have a deck, big or small. Isn't it better to have small deck than no deck at all? Thinking of putting a patio in this summer though.

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  6. i like your deck! and your deck is bigger than mine (SERIOUSLY)!

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  7. Hahahahahahahaha! Awesome. I'm uber jealous of your small deck because I am deck-less. Ya, ya, call it deck envy if you'd like, but one of these days (we're hoping for Spring 2012!), I too will have a deck, a DIY, sweat and toil kinda deck that is made by hand. And I guarantee that it'll be uglier than yours! Haha! We get free "magazines" from Lowes in the mail called Creative Ideas (http://www.lowescreativeideas.com/Home.aspx). The last one they had left me drooling (literally drooling) to own a deck, large or small, with their ideas.

    First off, you either need to paint or stain it. My personal choice (depending on the color of your house) would be pigmented stain. We used red and blue stain for the kids' playset and *LOVE* it!

    Then, some personal touches. Planters with flowers, some tiki torches (you can buy the short ones and drill a hole in the railing) or a string of non-Christmassy lights, candles, and seating of some sort. If you want to dine out there, a nice lil' table and chairs. I know that Walmart has a cute set on sale here for about $100 with two chairs (http://www.walmart.com/ip/Mainstays-Crossman-3-Piece-Bistro-Set-Green/15522571) and a little table, and even though your deck is small, I'd bet they would fit!

    No matter what you choose to do, I want to see pix!

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  8. Your deck has such a beautiful view! You don't really have room for much furniture, but a couple of comfy chairs would be great.
    Google "container flower gardens" and get some ideas for plants that don't require a lot of maintenance. Wal-Mart has some big, colorful containers that are plastic, but they look great with flowers cascading out of them.
    A string of patio lights would be pretty along the railing, too. I always think they look so happy and festive in the evening. Can't wait to see it when you get done!
    I need a "patio project" here, too!

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  9. Last spring we had our deck enlarged. With that being said I would say a power washing and perhaps some paint or stain would make it look better to the eyes and We have done window boxes on the end of the deck for a garden. Here is a link to my container gardens that I started last spring. I don't mean to make you feel bad about the size of yours when you look at mine I just think you would probably like the garden there, our always makes me want to go out there all the time.
    http://throwingpaintblog.blogspot.com/2010/07/mary-mary-quite-contrary.html

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  10. I love your dirty deck...I mean, mind. I agree with firefly. Power washing and stain can go a long way for little money. Stroke it's little ego and it'll grow into a deck even you can be proud of! : )

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  11. Hi my name is Sarah and I, too, have a small deck. We are hoping to *enlarge* it this spring though.

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  12. We powerwashed one at a family rental property last year and that alone made a HUGE difference? It was probably about the same size as yours and we spent about $50 in a tinted stain and it looks like a new deck! Also - I got a hand-me-down wicker set last summer that was black (what were they thinking?!?!). After a couple cans of spray paint it looks awesome - watch rummage sales or craigslist for cheap furniture your could paint to make your own.

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  13. You'll be surprised that our deck is actually worse than yours! I know! It's not even safe to really be out there playing (but we still do) and it's just covered in cracks and nasty green moss. If we get to fix it we will be replacing the boards with those fake plastic ones that don't allow moss to grow. I hope by now you have figured out what to do with yours - if so, share with the rest of us!

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