It's ON...Sort Of

For the past nine months or so, I've been eating for two. And by "eating for two" I mean "eating for two big burly Sumo wrestlers who have that weird disorder where they never feel full." Just as I promised myself I wouldn't, I gained a painful 70+ pounds during this pregnancy. Unfortunately, when Coby came out, he was 9 pounds, not 60 as I had hoped. So I can't exactly blame the "baby weight" on the baby ... damn it. If we're gonna be honest here, I think the blame lies more with myself. And, of course, the help of two guys named Ben and Jerry. Damn them and their delicious ice cream.

It's so easy to pile on the pounds during pregnancy, though. At least for me it is. I really am always ravenous, right from the first trimester - it's like my version of morning sickness is just extreme hunger. The only way to cure it is to eat. And nobody notices that my ass, hips, and thighs are widening at a frightening pace when my belly looks like I'm smuggling a Volkswagen.

But then I have the baby. And the stomach diminishes. And, whoa! Look what was going on underneath that belly ... construction of a new pair of thunder thighs! Needless to say, I do not relish my new pear shape.

It's really hard for me to deal with, because I used to be damn cute. My first pregnancy absolutely wrecked my body, though. I can lose the weight - I lost 90 pounds within six months of having Cameron - but the stretchmarks? If you've been reading my blog for a while, you already know that my once-sexy stomach serves as a cautionary tale.

(Side note: God bless Curtis, who has seen - and loved - both my pre- and post-baby body!)

Anyway, we may or may not be done having kids ... we can't exactly decide at this point. But I do know this: if I ever have another one, it won't be for at least four years, when my other kids are more self-sufficient (because as I've learned in the past eleven days, having two babies barely 19 months apart is not the easiest thing). So that gives me four years to go from "hot mess" to "hot mom" again.

I'm not starting hardcore on my diet right at this minute. Because I know that, after eating everything in sight pretty much whatever I want for the past 9 months, jumping into a severely restricted diet will only set me up for failure. But I'm easing into it. I have managed to fight off the urge to bake, for example, which is a huge triumph. I'm trying to cut down on my portion sizes and drinking fewery sugary beverages (I am mourning the loss of my sweet tea as we speak). I'm getting a gym membership, because I truly do enjoy working out. And I'm breastfeeding (see here if you want the back story on that) which burns like 500 extra calories a day or something.

In the meantime, it's high time I started appreciating what I do have. Yeah, I loathe my body in its present state, but I might as well fix it up as nicely as I can ... it's the only one I have, and it has produced three beautiful sons, so I can't be hatin' on it too much. I'm going to start paying more attention to my hair and nails and skin and all, and make everything look as decent as it possibly can. I may feel like I'm shining up a clunker, but I'm sure it will make me feel better.

So it begins. I've been doing this blog since I was three months pregnant. Now, for the first time, I am OFFICIALLY, really and truly "fighting off frumpy."

Who's with me?!?


  1. It is a constant battle for me so I guess Im in

  2. It sounds like you are excited to get your body in shape - congrats to you. :) Be cautious with the amount you exercise while you breastfeed....BF'ing is a great tool to lose some of the excess, I did it with two babies and loved the results. After about 3 months you really start to see it. Don't be discouraged at first. :) DRINK PLENTY OF WATER. It helps with weight loss AND breastfeeding sustainability. So I'll say it again. DRINK PLENTY OF WATER!

    Enjoy your next four years getting your body back. In the meantime, enjoy the loveyl family you have to show for it.

    Happy Friday. I'm popping over from SITS roll call.

  3. I am so with ya. My youngest is 5 and I still blame her for my pear shape :) I think you are well deserving of a blow out, a pedi and a facial. That's a jump start that may stave off the sweet tea craving. GOOD LUCK! Can't wait to see your Hot Mama Results.

  4. You should come join Mama Notes' Body After Baby challenge! I <3 the support and accountability.

    Also, baby might not have been 60 pounds, but there's also water weight, breastmilk-y boobs, and the other, um fluids involved in pregnancy.

  5. dammit. I've been eating for two for YEARS and my baby is 11.

  6. Good luck.

    I'll try to Fight off Frumpy but I like food too much. Oh, and my sweatpants.

  7. You will feel so much better if you fix yourself up. And go buy one outfit that fits. Don't worry about the size, you will feel so good getting out of maternity clothes and/or sweats.

    And I think our hubby's are truly blind to our bodies. My hubby doesn't seem to see the grossness which I have become. Kinda helps a little.

    And don't forget, while you're breast feeding you are supposed to be consuming more calories. You don't want to get worn out from dieting and then not be able to handle the kiddos!

    Good luck, I'm sure you will do great. Take a before and after picture! You don't have to be in biking shorts and a sports bra like on The Biggest Loser, just normal clothes will do. :)

  8. That was totally an awesome blog! I will face the frump with you, my friend!

  9. I have 8 months post-partum under the belt ... where it looks like lovely baby fat is still lingering. So, I'm in. I'm going to fight frumpy with you! Give it the old one-two.

  10. Get it girl!!!

    I've really let myself go over the last year (okay, closer to 2), so I'm going to get RELIGIOUS with a work out plan starting this coming week. I'm down to not being able to wear anything but sweat pants and t-shirts.

    Wish you were closer so we could motivate one another! It always helps to have someone who can keep you accountable.

  11. I will be soon! We are down to 11 days until baby... and I'm somewhere between 40-50 pounds gained. I lost count...

  12. It's been almost a year since Sophie was born and her brother still grabs my tummy and says "baby sister", so I guess I can say I'm in too......though I have to say, I have lost weight, the tummy just isn't going away this time!

  13. You inspire me! At 62, I'm STILL fighting the frump....and it gets harder all the time. I'm going to start exercising more and eating less right now!

  14. Yay!! I'm so happy for you! Your post coulda been mine Girl! Going thru the exact same thing! We'll have to do a long distance Biggest Loser! ANYBODY ELSE WANNA JOIN?
    Congrats on the baby!!! I can't imagine my life with Hootie, even if I gained 60lbs and was more depressed than any other time in my life! Seriously! Well, I got your back!

  15. Good luck! I am happy for you Rita. And rooting you on.

  16. I've been on journey since May but I will gladly get even more official about it by joining you in fighting off frumpy! I have NO excuses. My body-changer is 27 and I quit smoking in '96, so this all is just... what it is. Hubby does care but loves me madly anyway (thank God). I mean, this isn't who he married & he recently got back into shape and looks great. He's looking forward to me getting into the best shape ever (healthy & slender). So yes, it is time to banish frumpiness from the kingdom of Nan forever.

  17. I'm with you! we should set up something to actually monitor progress and share tips on our "clunker polishing"

  18. I'm with you. I was 114 at my 12 wk appt with my first and 168 at delivery. So that's a big % on a small frame. And it happened again with my second, 168lbs.

    I am a stretchmark zombie even though I'm back to 110lbs. My stomach is forever destroyed...and don't get me started on the chest. Am I the only one that went from a 34B to a 38DD (yes...DD, what kind of cruel world is this?), back to a 32A . AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! Needless to say...there are stretchmarks there as well.

    Sorry it happened to you too, but so glad I'm not alone. ;)


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