What is "It?"

Okay, somebody explain it to me. What is that thing that makes some girls look cute and trendy no matter what they wear? It's this subtle, imperceptible difference between them and the "normal" girls. In school, the popular girls all seem to have it; I think this is a universal truth. It's not a matter of facial beauty, it's something much less obvious. And if I could find out what it is, I would totally a. ) bottle that shit up and b.) become a bazillionaire selling it to every woman who's ever felt jealous of another woman's cuteness. Which is like 99% of women. Seriously, if you have never envied the way someone else looks you need to get out of my blog and go sell some self-help advice and make like motivational speeches or something.

I'm ranting about this right now because it's been on my mind since the other day when I was standing in the checkout line at Hobby Lobby. I was in the college town where my family lives (Columbia, MO ... holla!) and the girl in front of me was your typical cute coed. But I couldn't figure out why. She was wearing something that would normally be considered frumpy: sweatpants or some sort of workout pants sloppily tucked into some Ugg boots, and an oversized shirt with some advertisement on it or the name of a softball team or something. And her hair was literally just bunched up on top of her head and secured with a ponytail holder. But here's the thing: she looked good. Better than me on my best day. Guys were checking her out, and I guaran-damn-tee you they weren't nudging each other in the parking lot saying, "OMG, Jared, did you see that outfit? Total disaster. Does she not own a mirror? Crazy. Got any gum?"

I'll guaran-damn-tee you something else, too. If I walked into the Hobby Lobby wearing an identical outfit , even if I miraculously reverted to my decent pre-baby bod, I would look totally, completely, 100% frumpy. And no one - no one - would think I was cute. Why? Because I don't have that "thing." I've never had it. I started to realize that in high school, when I noted that Becky White's legs looked perfectly smooth and pretty, where mine looked stubbly even after I'd just shaved them. Why were those the girls who could look cute 24-7 - what did they possess that made their hairstyles cuter, their outfits trendier ... their body hair less noticeable? And wouldn't you know - they still looked like that at our class reunion. (I didn't look at Becky's legs, but I bet you they're still nice.)

I don't know what this thing is, but I'm tired of not having it. I don't think it's confidence, although I know that's a big part of how you carry yourself. I don't know what it is.

If you've figured "it" out, let me know what it is. And where the hell I can get some.


  1. When you get your answer be sure to let me know. OK?

  2. HEY - I used to live in Columbia MO (and left an ex there, whew) - so you know where Fulton is, where I graduated HS from? Where cool girls walked the halls like they owned it? IT - a combo of confidence and an "I just don't care what you think of me but you wish I was in your life and you can't have me there" attitude. So of course, everyone wants that person in their life simply 'cause they can't. And I must say, you are the Queen of IT in the blogging world where you aren't judged on your Ugg or lack of Ugg 'cause no one can see you!! So celebrate your "IT-ness! Everyone wants to be YOU!

  3. Julie - will do! :)

    Nan - OMG! Of course I know Fulton - I'm a native Missourian! I was born in Moberly and raised just a few miles from there, in Huntsville. Know either of those places? What a small world! And by the way ... you are tooooo sweet ... I never feel like the Queen of "IT," more like the Queen of ... something that rhymes with IT. ;)

  4. I think you're right - there's definitely a confidence factor - but there's something else that I just ... can't ... put ... my finger on. ???

  5. I don't think I have that thing either.

    I think whenever I go out I just look tired. I try to put on makeup and cover the black circles under my eyes but it doesn't work.

  6. Whatever "it" is...I hate "it"!! If "it" would go away, then it would all be good!

  7. I am not sure if it is confidence. I don't know what it is. But I think you are on to it, or at the very least, something.

    loved this post!

  8. I was thinking about your blog today while in Belks and seeing all sorts of... NOT its wandering around. It was so awful it hurt my eyes. Sweat pants on a... well what is that saying? Two pigs fighting in a blanket? Cropped pants right below the knee with huge slip on shoes, and BARE nasty hairy white legs. I have re-thunk it. IT people also know what NOT to wear in public 'cause if it lets people see your bum bounce, you shouldn't be out in public in it - Go Hornets, Beat Spartans and those other Hornets (heh heh). I feel better.

  9. Small world...I have family in Moberly, Macon, Sturgeon and Columbia(and a few other smaller towns) 3 of my aunts actually work at the university hospital in Columbia. I was born in Kansas City, but moved here to TX as a toddler. We do go back to visit as often as possible though:)

  10. Christin....I'm Rita's mom and I also work at University Hospital in Columbia! How funny!

    I think there have been ITs as long as there have been people. Some have it, some don't. I seem to be one that doesn't. ;o)

  11. I don't know what that thing is either, but I wish I had it. There is a mom at my son's school that thinks she is IT. When I look at her, I try to figure out what it is about her that makes her have such a commanding presence, but I cannot figure it out. I know I don't like her (she has never been friendly towards me and couldn't even be bothered to say "thank you" or acknowledge me when I picked up something she dropped and handed it back to her), but I can guarantee that if we both walked into a room, she would get noticed first. I mean, I kind of like being a wallflower, but at the same time, it would be nice if I didn't always have to be one. Oh well.

    On a side note, since y'all are making Missouri connections, my dad grew up on Monett and attended the University of Missouri School of Mines and Metallurgy. :)


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