Is That What I Think It Is?

I love my kids, but let me be honest here for a hot second: I can't wait until they're old enough that their artwork doesn't require translation. My budding artistes do more explaining than Tiger Woods college professors. What are these sticks up top? Oh ... clouds. Who is this, with the legs coming out of his head? Oh ... it's Daddy. Of course. Who's this with the mustache? Oh yes, I see ... it's Mommy. Very nice, buddy.

Y'know?

Anyway, Colin has done it again. Another fabulous portrait of yours truly, this time on a Famous Dave's kids' menu. Only this drawing contains something a little more perplexing than the mustache.

I don't know what to think. What in the hell could that be besides ... well, exactly what it looks like? I mean, I realize that he's a boy, and lives in a house full of other males. But after all the (endless, awkward) explanations of the differences between male and female genitalia, and the fact that he and his brother accompany me (uninvited) to the bathroom practically every.single.time I go, I'd think he would know that Mommy doesn't look like that down South.

The mustache I understand; I've had some beard issues. A picture of me with facial hair isn't so farfetched. (It wasn't really a mustache, anyway ... it was supposed to be a frowny face.) But I'm not sure what to make of the extra appendage in this picture. I guess it could be a beard - it is sprouting from my chin after all - but then again, so are my legs.

In case you're wondering, all Colin offered up was a disinterested shrug by way of explanation. (So much for going straight to the source. I suppose that's what I get for asking him while "Team Umizoomi" is on.)

So, like the reason behind the Mona Lisa's famously mysterious smile ... I guess we'll never know.

P.S. - Andy/Cameron update coming soon. Promise. Until then: I love you guys. You all ROCK!