Bobby-Pains



Embarrassing confession time: I am thirty years old and had to Google "how to use a bobby pin."

This is comparable to, like, a dude saying he doesn't know how to use a screwdriver. Or that he really doesn't get football. The ability to use a bobby pin is a skill that, apparently, most girls are born with. Except for me, because my personality is sadly gender-confused. I'm Kate Winslet hocking a loogie off the side of the Titanic. Maybe it's a good thing that I've birthed a gaggle of boys.

I have tried - unsuccessfully - for years to bobby pin my own hair ... but for some reason, I just can't get them to hold it in place. Like my foray into the world of Bumpits, my (mis)use of bobby pins only leads to less-than-flattering hairstyles. Okay, so they're actually straight-up hair fails. But unlike Bumpits, which are a relatively new addition to the arsenal of hair-doing-gadgets, bobby pins have been around since pre-history. I seriously think the cavewomen were using them ... or at least the ancient Egyptians (I mean, they had eyeliner). So, unlike Bumpits, which I don't mind asking for directions to use, my pride has not permitted me to ask how to properly use a bobby pin. Because I should totally know. I'm a girl. And I've had hair for, like, 29 years now.

Seeing as it's holiday party season, all of my magazines are trying to teach me "TEN EASY PARTY UPDOS!" and "PARTY-PRETTY HAIR IN MINUTES!" But when you're me, here's how it goes down:

Step one: pull hair back into a ponytail. (Yay, I got this!)

Step two: twist ponytail and wrap hair around elastic. (Done and done. Now what?)

Step three: secure bun with bobby pins. ( ............ Shit.)

What these magazines are forgetting is that a small percentage of their readership (um, me) are ill-versed in the womanly way of the bobby pin. A tutorial would be greatly appreciated, but apparently it should be second nature.

So yeah. I Googled it. And then scooted far back, lest a hand come out of my computer screen and slap me for not having any common sense.

(Hey, I can't help it. I've got to be at some sort of disadvantage ... my hair looks like this.)

I found more instructions on how to use bobby pins to pick a lock than how to use them in your hair. But there were a couple of decent how-to guides.

Let's just hope my "girl gene" is developed enough to retain the information ...



11 comments:

  1. depending on how thick your hair is, if you are doing a bun you might want to use hair pins (shaped like a 'u' with really long arms) instead of bobby pins. Bend one arm of the 'u' back on itself so you have kind of a wonky 's' shape (this would be SO much asier if I could draw you a picture) and then insert into hair. the arm you bent back will keep the pin from pulling out.

    Also, the new Goody spin pins (shaped like spirals) are AWESOME for holding hair and they are pretty fool proof to use - just spin them into your hair. They are kind of expensive, but totally worth it.

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  2. There are a great many "girl" things that I don't think I understand. And booby pins are super hard to do on your own.

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  3. Aaahahaha that's awesome. :-D I have a ton of hair too, and though I'm not very good at doing fancy things with it, I've found that the secret to getting a bobby pin to stay is criss-crossing 2 of them over each other. But if you're just trying to secure a bun or something, the giant bobby pins work best (I didn't know this until my friend, who is a hairdresser, did my hair for my wedding... she let me keep her bobby pins. Bless her.)

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  4. Too funny! If it's any consolation, I'd never even heard of bumpits until this blog. So I clicked your link to see your hair which had a link in the "you might also like" to your bumpits blog and so now I'm informed! Thanks for letting me keep up with the times. :)

    And for further consolation...I "know" how to use those bobby pin thingys...but my hair is so fine that they literally just fall right back out. Bobby pins do nothing for me. :)

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  5. I have too much hair for bobby pins and still wouldn't understand how to use them. I did once you-tube make up and got some great tips from a 14 year old girl lol. Maybe she has a bobby pin video for you. ;) good luck

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  6. I think that you have been in a house with too many boys for too long.

    Get some girl action up in there. ;)

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  7. When I had long hair during my hippy stage. I could wrap it without the rubber band in a coil like bun and secure it with three 2 inch bobby pins. It never came down. I slept with it that way so it wouldn't wrap around my neck. "I'm so proud of myself" lol

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  8. Oh my! I've neglected your bobby pin education! When I was in about 6th grade, we used to pincurl our hair at night with bobby pins. When we took them out in the morning, we had these weird, pin-marked curls that - now that I think about it - were totally unattractive. But it was the style, darn it! After that came the phase where we anchored our brush rollers with bobby pins, and later we used them to hold our long hair in a bun like your Aunt Judy mentioned (though she was much better at it than me). I don't think I've used them in my hair since then, but they're handy as bookmarks! LOL

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  9. omg i would DIE without my bobby pins...literally its the ONLY thing i put in my hair. let me know if you need any tips ;) happy new year lady!

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  10. Rita, I just figured out bobby pins a few months ago for the front pouf. I tried the bop-its and failed miserably. I found videos by Purse Buzz on YouTube Helpful. Here's one: http://www.youtube.com/user/pursebuzz#p/search/0/FMQ2xEh4ypY

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  11. I've always thought I knew how to use bobby pins, until one day when I was watching a youtube video and the guy doing the girls hair did something wacky with the bobby pins and said it was the proper way to use them. This video was very helpful to me:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzJQ88K2QQg&list=LLr48szAmU49vyEQnOyLq2jw&feature=mh_lolz

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